“Alright… I’m going to head up and take care of some stuff.”
Skyblack eyed the blue mare for a second.
“You could at least tell me what I’m going to be doing other than… well, killing.”
“Oh… yeah. Hyper Flicker!” She hollered, catching the attention of a purple colored mare that happened to be walking by. “Show this new employee around, tell him how things go here.”She leaned over to Skyblack’s ear. “We’ll talk more when I get back.”
Hyper Flicker came over.
“Ms. Dash, I don’t have time for this! Five of the guards are lying dead in the hallways and it needs cle-“
Rainbow hushed her. “I know.”
“Ho-“ “Because I’m just that awesome. Anyways, tell him about it.”
“Fine… “ She turned to Skyblack, the black stallion getting bored at the minor chit-chat. “Now a rainbow’s tale isn’t quite as nice, as the story you knew of sugar and spice…”
“Hyper, he watched a mare go through the Pegasus Device. I think he’s figured that much out. Just hop to it already so I can go!”
“Ok so he knows about the Spectra already…”
Rainbow looked at him again. “The color drained off of the… ahem… resources.”
“Now, I’m goin’. Take him to the break room, will ya?”
With that, she scurried off.
“Alright, so what’s happening? Am I getting paid for this shit? Because even if I’m not, I’m still willing…”
“Yep, you get paid. Rainbow’s just that kind, you work hard enough and show loyalty, and you walk out with a massive check that could buy twelve Cloudsdale houses.” She walked to the window. “So you’ve seen the Pegasus Device. Running for ten years straight without a single call to maintenance.”
“You expect to tell me that damned thing runs efficiently without you cleaning it?”
“Then why don’t you clean it?”
“Hey, you want to gear up in a thirty five pound biohazard suit and climb in, evading every little nook and cranny that’ll turn you into a rainbow, while taking it apart piece by piece and scrubbing it with what’s essentially a glorified toothpick, be my guest.”
Skyblack looked stunned.
“… Maybe next week.”
“That’s what I thought. Now, on to the break room, shall we?”
They headed down the hall, and opened up another door.
“Alright, ponies, this is the new employee: Uhh…”
“Skyblack. Skyblack Graymane.”
“Skyblack Graymane! Let’s give him our best company welcome. Would you like some coffee? Or rather, some coffee grounds in water? Rainbow hasn’t let us replace our once-again-broken coffee pot again.”
Skyblack wanted to start killing already, but he decided to examine the coffee pot, in which he found something.
“Say what now?”
“It’s unplugged.” He plugged it back in. “Somepony decided to pull a joke.”
“Me! It was me!” a rather insane looking blue Pegasus shouted. “I wantin’ ta see how long it’d take ya to notice. Hahaha, a year! A full year!”
Hyper was far from amused. “I swear to Luna, Contrail, if you ever touch that coffee pot again, I will tear out your aortic artery and hang you from the edge of Cloudsdale with it! Anyways, so yeah…”“Yeah, about my retirement fund? If there is an instance when I say… want to settle down abit?”
“Ha, good luck with that. You can’t go quittin’. You pretty much do live here now. You got a room and everything. Not that we get to use it, because we barely have time while we’re still employing. We got good dinner and a maximum amount of hours that we can be forced to work though, mandatorily enforced by the same agency that makes sure we don’t kidnap and disembowel fillies. A.K.A, nopony.” She said sarcastically. “But hey, not only do we got coffee now, but unlike in Cloudsdale, we can go out in public after we wash up during the breaks.”
“Say what, now?” He had to live there? Well, at least he could leave and he was getting paid for it.
“Yup. Anyhow, I’m going to go see if the cleaning crew arrived yet. You left quite the mess out in the hallways and holding cells.”
Skyblack grinned. “Just what I do best.”
“Yeah, well keep a cap on it. Don’t want to kill the wrong pony, now do we? Not that you care, but still.” She began walking off. “Cheerio, boys! Keep everything company. Oh, and Pipe Gauge, you take care of the rest.”Another Pegasus walked up to Skyblack. “That’d be me. Any questions?”
“Yeah. Why are you ponies down here, anyways, and when am I gonna get to kill something?”
“Bad Publicity in Cloudsdale. Started with that damned lawsuit over the flight exams. Equestrian Supreme Court apparently thinks we don’t have the right to exile the failures. Eliminated a ton of our resources. Of course, then we had to start kidnapping ponies, especially after Dr. Atmosphere left. Fortunately he only killed a cadaver of Ms.Dash along the way. And don’t get too eager. You don’t do shit properly, you’ll end up as a rainbow.”
A loud boom sounded through the room. Skyblack and the others ran out to the source, to discover none other than a light green pony with black hair and sunglasses.
“Ponytastic! Dammit, what the hell is wrong with you?”
“Sorry, broseph. Got bored being stuck in this lab all day.”
Pipe Gauge facehoofed. Skyblack turned to him.
“That pony’s an idiot, isn’t he?”“Sorta. Not a complete one. He’s got a good degree in engineering and he’s pretty damned loyal. I would have killed him myself otherwise. You know that Pegasus Device? That’s the third version, and believe it or no, that dumbfuck of pony built it. Annoyed Rainbow about clearing an entire floor back in Cloudsdale, and she gave it to him just to get him out o’ her mane. He spent six months in there, didn’t come out for nothin’. They walk back in, and he’s sitting there with this huge ass grin on his face and the massive ass beauty behind him. No damned wonder Ms. Dash will let him get away with pretty much whatever he feels like.”
“Wow… He really seems like an idiot though.”
A mare’s voice came from behind. “You ready, Skyblack? To pick up Fluttershy and all that other stuff. Come on, let’s go! I ain’t got all day over here; I need to read the next Daring Do novel with Twilight!”
It was Rainbow Dash, obviously enough. Skyblack turned around, and replied.
“Why the hell not?”